Monday, November 7, 2011

Left Out

Rant rant rant. It's quite pathetic. The life I live. Gay. It happened quite long ago but I'm grounded. Idk if I mention it before on my blog, but it's for the stupidest reason ever. It's because I went to K-Box. 


WHAT THE SWEAR WORD.


Hah. Stupid. Not only is the reason stupid, the punishment is too. I'm grounded for the whole year! Like what the swear word?! And it's not like I went out secretly! I was suppose to go for a movie with my friends but the tickets were all sold out, so we went to K-Box instead. And I told my mum! I didn't hide it from her or anything!



NOW WHAT DID I DO WRONG??! IT'S NOT LIKE I COMMITTED A CRIME!



GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. And all my friends are going out, going to parties, hanging out after exams. And I'm stuck at home like a sad #foreveralone person. Every time someone asks me to go catch or movie or to go to a party, I have to turn them down. And in the end, they stop asking. I feel like burying myself in a hole. Feeling so left out. I don't know what the heck my mum is trying to do. It's like she doesn't want me to have a social life.


I told Liew Jiek's mum about it and she told my I should probably tell my mum the way I see it. That I didn't keep anything from her. That I told her the truth. I did try to try. But everyone I try to talk to my mum about things like that, I don't know. I just can't put it in words. Either I chicken out, or I get so so mad. Every time I try to tell me mum how I feel, I end up screaming and crying. And she ends up winning anyways. So what is the use?


I know the do this because they love me. Ya da ya da. I don't feel the love! All I feel is hate! I try not to. I pray. But gosh, this is so hard. I can't understand why they are treating me this way. 


I think I'm retarded. 


!@#$%^&*() I so feel like swearing now. Can't take this injustice!!


ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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