I turn on the music in a desperate attempt to drown you out, but nothing can silence the sound of your irascibility. I'm scared. I'm sorry. I really am.
Friday, January 31, 2014
Fear
I hate the sound of you fighting; I wish it was on the television instead so I could turn it off, or even at least turn the volume down. Your words, although not directed at me, hurts so bad. I fear quietly that someday you might leave and the permanent scars you would leave behind. Even if you stay, I wonder if things would stay the same. I get so indignant having to bear with your unreasonable outburst of anger. Undoubtedly, at times, I admit, I am to blame, but why do you channel all your negativeness at us?
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Let the end begin
Hi. So I honestly don't have a good reason for doing this but I'm not going to be blogging here anymore. I guess it kinda struck me that the reason I got a blog in the first place was the rant out my inmost feelings, a place I could pour it all out.
But now, as my viewers increase, I don't know, I feel like I can't do that anymore. And all my blog posts now are just lame and meaningless. I guess I realized that I blogged for the views.
And I don't want to anymore. I can't do it anymore.
So I guess saying a proper goodbye is the right thing to do. And well I'm sorry. Maybe I'll start blogging again. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll share it with you guys again. Maybe I won't.
But this blog has served me well, for so many years. And so have you readers. So thank you and sorry again.
With much much much love,
Shi Qi
God bless x
But now, as my viewers increase, I don't know, I feel like I can't do that anymore. And all my blog posts now are just lame and meaningless. I guess I realized that I blogged for the views.
And I don't want to anymore. I can't do it anymore.
So I guess saying a proper goodbye is the right thing to do. And well I'm sorry. Maybe I'll start blogging again. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll share it with you guys again. Maybe I won't.
But this blog has served me well, for so many years. And so have you readers. So thank you and sorry again.
With much much much love,
Shi Qi
God bless x
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Remember when
You know there are moments when something just suddenly reminds you of the past.
And well, I don't know, for me the past is not always a bad thing. Many people I know associate the best with all the bad things/ experiences that has happened to them before. But the past has always been well pretty good for me (so far ho ho)
But sometimes I get like super emo lah when a song comes up and remind me of the past. Not in a gosh before everything screwed up, but more of the sigh good times good times.
I realize I don't actually spent time regretting the past (yay me) aherm aherm
I spend time missing it.
Okay that is just as bad no?
WHAT THE.
YOU KNOW THAT FEELING WHEN YOU LISTEN TO A SONG AND SUDDENLY ALL THIS MEMORIES COME RUSHING BACK?
K that's a super sien feeling lah.
OR WHEN SOMETHING YOU SAW JUST REMINDS YOU OF THAT PERSON YOU DON'T TALK TO ANYMORE?!
Another super sien feeling.
OR WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST (WTH sounds so scary) AND ALL THIS EMOTIONS COMES BACK ALL OVER AGAIN?!??!
GAH!!
And you're like if only. If only I did it right. If only I didn't mess up. If only we were still friends. If only things didn't end the way it did.
Which... is pretty much regretting. Okay just cancel that part when I say I never regret.
But as they say..
And well, I don't know, for me the past is not always a bad thing. Many people I know associate the best with all the bad things/ experiences that has happened to them before. But the past has always been well pretty good for me (so far ho ho)
But sometimes I get like super emo lah when a song comes up and remind me of the past. Not in a gosh before everything screwed up, but more of the sigh good times good times.
I realize I don't actually spent time regretting the past (yay me) aherm aherm
I spend time missing it.
Okay that is just as bad no?
WHAT THE.
YOU KNOW THAT FEELING WHEN YOU LISTEN TO A SONG AND SUDDENLY ALL THIS MEMORIES COME RUSHING BACK?
K that's a super sien feeling lah.
OR WHEN SOMETHING YOU SAW JUST REMINDS YOU OF THAT PERSON YOU DON'T TALK TO ANYMORE?!
Another super sien feeling.
OR WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST (WTH sounds so scary) AND ALL THIS EMOTIONS COMES BACK ALL OVER AGAIN?!??!
GAH!!
And you're like if only. If only I did it right. If only I didn't mess up. If only we were still friends. If only things didn't end the way it did.
Which... is pretty much regretting. Okay just cancel that part when I say I never regret.
But as they say..
"Sometimes you need to forget the people in your past,
because they don't belong in your future."
Or something like that ;)
Bye x
Monday, June 25, 2012
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH
ALOHA!! So 'Oliver' is finally over. Which is, well, both good & bad.
Bad because I'll miss everyone. And the children T^T I'll really miss the children. Bad because I don't get to skip school any more. Bad because I don't get to see my eye candy any more. Bad because I miss the aunties putting on my make up for me... Yeah okay.
Good because I now I can finally breathe and like blog.
HAH. Only one good point. Gayyyy.
K so I'm super lazy now. I promise a longer post tmr. Promise. K bye x
Bad because I'll miss everyone. And the children T^T I'll really miss the children. Bad because I don't get to skip school any more. Bad because I don't get to see my eye candy any more. Bad because I miss the aunties putting on my make up for me... Yeah okay.
Good because I now I can finally breathe and like blog.
HAH. Only one good point. Gayyyy.
K so I'm super lazy now. I promise a longer post tmr. Promise. K bye x
Sunday, June 17, 2012
RANT
I don't know suddenly my blog feels much more personal. Maybe because I feel like blogging about some more personal stuff. Er okay.
So I don't have any specific topic, just want to rant.
I love ranting. It makes you feel so much better afters.
So I am a slack. I have piano exams in less than 24 hours and I am still blogging and wasting my precious time away. It's not like I can play everything very well already either. I'm practically on the edge of failing my exams. But I'm still not practising like siao. Well I did practice a little and I keep playing it all wrong which makes me so so so mad I cannot even!
That feeling you get when you try so hard but you just can't get it right. Argh,
So I gave up. Yes yada yada I'm such a quitter. K thanks I know that already don't have to remind me.
I feel so stressed out. So out of place. I just want to hurry though this week and be done with me. Then everything will be back to normal. Life wouldn't be so hectic. I can actually stop to smell the flowers again (HAHAHAHHA WTH)
So yeah.
SIEN. I should stop complaining -____- my life is so good already pls. Compared to all those starving children in Africa?!?!??!
What is the gayness I cannot even..
See I so cute. I look like a boy ^^
Oh yeah speaking about how I look like a boy someone actually mistook me for a guy from behind cause I was wearing a football jersey.... -____-
Abit sad lah.
KKKKKK BYERS.
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Majesty
I realized I haven't been sharing songs lately. So here! :3 This is an amazing amazing song.
God Bless x
Friday, June 15, 2012
2012
HELLO! So I wrote this post very very long ago and I was just looking through my drafts and I thought I should post it. So some of the things may be kinda outdated but whatever. HAHA
So, 2012. The end of the world?
Well for starters, Japan had a 7.0 multitude Earthquake. And I believe this is God trying to say something. I do believe that these are the signs to the end of the world.
Watch out that NO ONE DECEIVES YOU. And if you read the next lines it says that many will be deceived. Many will believe that the end is near.
I do NOT believe that 12.12.12 will be the end of the world. (Did I even get the date correct LOL)
Because...
And because no one knows we must all be prepared for it to happen. I mean it may happen any time!! *panic attack*
But there will be signs!
I guess it kinda scary cause like you'll never know when. Like some people have the mindset like it's okay if I'm all bad and what not now, I'm still young. I'll go to church and get closer to God when I'm old.
Then *bam* out of no where it's the end of the world and too bad you're going to hell.
Well, yes that's the cold hard truth.
Honestly I still have so many doubts like will I go the heaven?! I'm sure you do too. (If not, woah yay you!)
So yeah. Are you prepared?
So, 2012. The end of the world?
Well for starters, Japan had a 7.0 multitude Earthquake. And I believe this is God trying to say something. I do believe that these are the signs to the end of the world.
Jesus answered: “Watch out that no one deceives you. For many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah,’ and will deceive many. You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places.
Matthew 24: 4-7
Watch out that NO ONE DECEIVES YOU. And if you read the next lines it says that many will be deceived. Many will believe that the end is near.
I do NOT believe that 12.12.12 will be the end of the world. (Did I even get the date correct LOL)
Because...
No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.
Matthew 24:36
And because no one knows we must all be prepared for it to happen. I mean it may happen any time!! *panic attack*
But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.
Matthew 24:43-44
But there will be signs!
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places.Matt 24:7
I guess it kinda scary cause like you'll never know when. Like some people have the mindset like it's okay if I'm all bad and what not now, I'm still young. I'll go to church and get closer to God when I'm old.
Then *bam* out of no where it's the end of the world and too bad you're going to hell.
Well, yes that's the cold hard truth.
Honestly I still have so many doubts like will I go the heaven?! I'm sure you do too. (If not, woah yay you!)
So yeah. Are you prepared?
Monday, June 11, 2012
VIEWERS Y U SO UNFAITHFUL?!
Okay. So my blog views has dropped like siao after not blogging for a while! Hey I blogged short posts for you guys leh! :(
*heartbreaks*
Okay. Gay. Anyways, here are just a few pictures I took in Singapore! (Not in order of events!)
Only SOME of the yummeh food we ate.
*heartbreaks*
Y u guys no read my blog leh!!
Okay. Gay. Anyways, here are just a few pictures I took in Singapore! (Not in order of events!)
This is my checklist for my trip.
My cousin and her boyfie brought us prawning!!!
And well we actually only caught ONE prawn in an hour.
FAILURE
But the boss there was super nice lah and gave us free prawns. Probably cause he pitied us.
HAHAH and I counted there was about 25+ prawns? :)
K super cute $1 charity bracelet I bought at Cotton On.
Speaking of Cotton On, I bought quite alot of clothes from there,
As well as from other places. Yeah.
Not good. Spend alot of money.
Not good. Spend alot of money.
Only SOME of the yummeh food we ate.
Crazy cousin taking a picture INSIDE Forever 21!!!
Where there were loads of people staring!
Where there were loads of people staring!
I actually prefer the tee in the second pic.
But I couldn't find it in the other store I went to *cries*
But I couldn't find it in the other store I went to *cries*
Gay picture of me! My hair has grown!! :3
Okay the bone at my neck area is popping out. Disgusting...
Okay the bone at my neck area is popping out. Disgusting...
HEHEH my baby so cute! x
Brother bonding time = me forever alone
Random vain picture.
Finally decided to do my Art assignment. Haven't finished yet.
Supposed to have 15 drawings done when school reopens.
Supposed to have 15 drawings done when school reopens.
Drawing #2. Used my iPad to take this so it's really blur.
This is squid ink spaghetti. It's super gross looking and it smells kinda funny.
And it also made my lips gothic black.
BUT IT IS SO YUMMEH!!
And it also made my lips gothic black.
BUT IT IS SO YUMMEH!!
Other random vain pic.
Eyore says hi!!
COOKIES & CREAM! OH YUMS!
K I look super unglam but whatever. This was after we went on the Flying Fox.
Super fun!! Was kinda scary at first but the view was so pretty!
Super fun!! Was kinda scary at first but the view was so pretty!
OKAY SO YOU KNOW RIGHT. I went to take my harness out and there was this super cute guy who helped me unbuckle everything and he keep accidentally hitting my face and apologizing HAHAH SO CUTE ♥
Anyways, he was done unbuckling everything and I just stood there like an idiot staring at him. And so he stared back at me and it took me 3 secs to understand that I had to take out the harness myself.
Forever look stupid in front of cute guys.
So anyways, test papers are being given back this week and the first day has NOT been a good day already. What more to say all the other days. And super busy this week cause Oliver! is in 10 days and my piano exam is in 7 days. I can just go die now.
I haven't finish mastering all my pieces and scales for my piano exams. I was actually aiming for a distinction. Crap. If I get merit I'll be super happy. I just better not fail.
Sien.
I thought after all the exam stress *aherm aherm stress* Coming back to school would be more relaxing and what not. But still got Oliver! practices and exams. Omgsh and I was slacking the whole holidays doing non of this things. HAI YA WHAT IS THIS.
K sigh bye. God bless x
Anyways, he was done unbuckling everything and I just stood there like an idiot staring at him. And so he stared back at me and it took me 3 secs to understand that I had to take out the harness myself.
FAIL
Forever look stupid in front of cute guys.
So anyways, test papers are being given back this week and the first day has NOT been a good day already. What more to say all the other days. And super busy this week cause Oliver! is in 10 days and my piano exam is in 7 days. I can just go die now.
I haven't finish mastering all my pieces and scales for my piano exams. I was actually aiming for a distinction. Crap. If I get merit I'll be super happy. I just better not fail.
Sien.
I thought after all the exam stress *aherm aherm stress* Coming back to school would be more relaxing and what not. But still got Oliver! practices and exams. Omgsh and I was slacking the whole holidays doing non of this things. HAI YA WHAT IS THIS.
K sigh bye. God bless x
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Guest post: 7 Things You don’t need a Smartphone for (But use one for it anyway)
Smartphones (Android, iPhones, Blackberries) are wonderful things, aren’t they? They allow you to do things on the move, things you never thought you could do before. Now, we’re not saying that it’s a bad thing that you can tell the world about how interesting your last session in the toilet was. But why? Why, for the love of things all decent and holy, would you do such a thing?
People love their smartphones, and they love using them. Even
for some of the more nonsensical reasons we’re going to list below. Here are seven
things that people do, when they really, really don’t have to. How many are
YOU guilty of?
7. Telling people
where you are
Foursquare. Facebook Check-In. Google Latitude. Footprints.
Twitter geo-tagging. All of these things are ways for you to let people know
where you are. It’s almost like we’re inviting
stalkers to come and look for us. Wondering how that creepy kid in the year
below always seems to know where you are? Tried thinking of a way to get rid of
unwanted attention? STOP TELLING EVERYONE WHERE YOU ARE EVERY SECOND OF THE
DAY. Whatever happened to, you know, telling people through a call or text
message? It’s almost like people have forgotten why we have phones in the first
place. Speaking of
which…
6.Finding your phone
Apple’s Mobile Me. HTC’s Sense. Just two services that allow
you to find your phone in case, you know, you lose it. Sure, it’s great in
principle. Find a computer, log in, track where your phone is. Now, here’s the
rub. If you can remember your secure login password, why can’t you remember
where you put your phone? Take proper care of it! A guy would never willingly
let his PS3 or car keys simply drop out of sight, but phones go missing all the
time. Either we do that, or we borrow someone’s phone to play ‘let’s follow the
ring tone.’ It’s like playing hide and seek, only dumber and far more
expensive.
5. Exercising
All smartphones have accelerometers and GPS. For exercising,
the idea is to plan out your jogging route, or an exercise routine, strap the
phone somehow to your body, and then get the phone to calculate your burned
calories and exercise distance. WHY? Count how long you’ve been jogging! Read
the distance on your treadmill! No, I do not want to upload my data to nike.com
so that they can figure out if I’m exercising properly or not. I’d be TIRED. I
can TELL when I’m tired!
4. Taking
artsy-fartsy photographs with an app
You have Instagram. Even better, you have Camera360. No,
wait, you have Facebook’s camera app with all those nice looking effects.
Here’s a home truth: YOU ARE NOT A PHOTOGRAPHER. You have not been elevated to
the status of recorder of human history or wonderfully artistic hipster by
virtue of applying a sepia effect and Helvetica-fonted phrases! It’s like
saying I should be an award-winning composer by virtue of being able to guess
the name of a Beethoven symphony. Or my cat being allowed to schedule my life
because he learned how to flush a toilet.
3. Typing
looooooonnggg messages and emails
Get a laptop. It’ll be cheaper than an iPhone 4S, or a
Samsung Galaxy SIII. It’ll be able to do more things. It’ll even let you go
online without going blind as you squint and constantly readjust text on screen
to be readable. You’d even have the
comfort of typing on a full keyboard! Or watch movies! Speaking of movies…
2. Watching movies
(or enjoying any type of media)
This one irks me. Why do people downsize their movie files,
or compress their music, compromise the quality, and then complain about their
phones being crap at playing media?! Sure, you have dedicated apps for music
and movies. But on a tiny 3.7 inch screen? With electronics that are not
optimised for audio or video reproduction? Are you KIDDING ME? Yes, let’s
listen to lousy compressed mp3s of 1Direction because it’s cool to use a smartphone to do it.
1. Checking the time
This is the single biggest reason why we always run out of
phone battery. The screen takes up most of the battery power, due to the
display. And what do we do 847 times in a day? Use our phones to check the
time! Get a watch! Save yourself the trouble of wasting battery just to CHECK
THE TIME. And you wonder why your phone always runs out of battery.
Can you think of any other useless things people use a
smartphone for? Leave a comment or let the writer know.
About the Writer
Hailing from Kuching, Sarawak, Syed Rafie is more than just a wordsmith with an unnatural love for electronics, gadgets and video games. Working as a writer and editor at Malaysia’s largest online shopping mall, Lazada Malaysia, he tends to favour pursuits that challenge his lack of physical refinement and his obvious intellectual deficiencies. Connect with him on Google+ (Syed Rafie), or follow him on Twitter (@origamiblade) for more product news, previews, reviews, comparisons and personal thoughts that could mangle your understanding of the space-time continuum.
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